


Ten Easy Steps Toward Piracy

by holdouttrout



Category: Stargate SG-1
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-04-11
Updated: 2007-04-11
Packaged: 2017-11-15 20:59:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,788
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/531636
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/holdouttrout/pseuds/holdouttrout
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Vala gets an idea in her head, there's no stopping her. And maybe she's watched too many pirate movies, but Teal'c's hoping it will turn out all right in the end.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Ten Easy Steps Toward Piracy

**Author's Note:**

> For the spacepirate_fic challenge. My claim was Teal'c and Vala, but not as a pairing. Thanks to annerbhp, who never seemed to mind that I was horribly late and in fact encouraged me just recently, to everyone on my friends list who never yelled at me, and for knightedrogue, who looked this over and told me it was okay to post. Also, to my RL friend (you know who you are) who gave me much needed emotional support and mocked me gently.

It had been Daniel Jackson’s idea that Teal'c accompany Vala on her mission to contact her former associates. The idea was that Teal'c would be there to get Vala out of the trouble she had undoubtedly underestimated, and then, once that was done, they would rejoin Daniel, presumably with information of Galactic Importance.

But Vala hadn’t exactly underestimated the trouble; this time, she’d exaggerated, and her former associates--who would have dealt with her quite rationally, and who had not been in contact with, well, _anyone_ , since the defeat of the Goa’uld--reacted quite negatively to the presence of a Jaffa. Despite Teal’c’s best efforts to convince them he wasn’t going to try to enslave anybody, they’d figured Vala had been re-taken as a host and had locked them up.

Vala hadn’t exactly been helpful.

Teal’c might have to mention his displeasure at the plan to Daniel Jackson at their next meeting.

Escaping from the former associates wasn’t terribly difficult; they tricked the guards (although Vala was sometimes infuriating, she was terribly good at devising effective rouses), sneaked and fought their way through corridors, and stole a ship.

Vala christened it the _Black Heart_ , because “we’re officially pirates, now.”

“I believe that pirates commonly raided ships on the high seas during several periods of Tau'ri history,” Teal’c pointed out. “We might be characterized as thieves for stealing the ship, but not pirates.”

Vala cocked her head at him, nodded thoughtfully. “You might be right.”

In hindsight, Teal’c mused, he should not have underestimated Vala’s formidable will. He should, perhaps, have paid attention to where Vala was navigating. He should definitely have noticed she was entirely too quiet to not be planning something. Planning things was what Vala did.

They ended up in the path of an Ori warship, which wouldn’t have happened if Vala wasn’t actively looking for a small, Lucien-alliance freighter to raid. The Ori ship was prepared to ignore them completely--they were small and not a threat and would be taken care of soon enough, hallowed be the Ori—but Vala went and hailed them and asked if the Orici was on board, and if she was, could they please inform her that her mother was very, very disappointed in her?

Unfortunately for them both, the Orici was on board, and demanded they be taken hostage.

Here, Teal’c intervened, doing the only logical thing he could think of: he ringed them over to the ship.

“Good move,” Vala stage-whispered, “We might be able to incite a mutiny.”

She was being particularly obtuse about the pirate thing.

She insisted they find suitable outfits. Teal'c raised his eyebrow, but allowed her to dress him in a loose white shirt and the same drab pants everyone else was wearing around here. He didn't ask where she found the boots, or the bandanna she tied around his head--

“To disguise that distinctive tattoo,” she said, a little breathily, but Teal'c was used to her and paid it no attention.

Their first convert was pathetically easy to acquire.

They rounded a corner, came face to face with a young man who stopped abruptly in front of Teal'c's admittedly impressive bulk.

Vala spoke. “The Ori are false gods. Renounce them and help us.”

The young man's mouth dropped open; he gulped, looked at Teal'c, who nodded gravely.

He shuffled his feet, blinked, swallowed.

“What do you need me to do?”

Teal'c raised an eyebrow. “Why should we believe you would help us?” He dodged Vala's  foot easily, straightened to tower over their potential convert.

The man looked down and spoke with a quiet anger. “They killed my mother and my sisters. They weren't involved with any opposition, but they murdered them in front of me. They use people like things.”

Vala looked the man in the eye, serious. “Yes. They do.” The man nodded back at her, and she asked him, “You tell anyone else?”

The man laughed. “Think I'd be here if I had?”

Vala shrugged casually.

The man shuffled his feet, gave Teal'c another look, but addressed Vala. “I do know some, though, who feel the same.”

Vala smiled widely. “Take us to them.”

*_*_*_*_*

Teal'c realized that Vala was the one who was going to convince these people, if they could truly be convinced. He'd learned how important it was for people to see his own sincerity, and he was willing to allow Vala the same lassitude O'Neill had shown him.

In less than a few hours, they had confirmation of a hundred or so who were absolutely willing to go against their godlike masters. Vala and Teal'c met only with five, including Hanis, the first. The others were Jeno, who was as old as any of the invaders, with hair just turning silver; Leo and Lul, twin brothers who had lost their father to accusations—proven true when they found his secret journals months later; and Neyo, who was so young his voice was still breaking.

Teal'c still wasn't convinced their ragtag group could accomplish an escape, let alone a takeover of the entire ship. He expressed his concerns to Vala.

She frowned. “Haven't you been listening?  We have a plan.”

Teal'c knew when to give in, having learned not to stand in the way of O'Neill's obstinacy.

Leo and Lul would take out the life-support. Apparently, Ori ships were designed with backup systems, but only in certain areas. Engineering, the control room, and living quarters. Weapons systems were considered secondary, and exposed to vacuum anyway, so their access points were shut down. Once they'd done that, most of Vala's followers would set up with suits in the corridors, making sure the life support didn't get fixed. Jeno would lead a team to take engineering. Neyo would be their spy in the control room and pass along communications to the rest of their converts.

Vala, Teal'c and Hanis were going for the Orici.

The first part of their plan went without a hitch. Everyone was in position on time. The life-support went down, and Vala, Teal'c and Hanis crowded into a little-used side corridor for a moment while hundreds of crusaders pounded by on the way to their stations. Then the three of them ran for the control room, Hanis in charge of warning them before they reached the last turn and the guards in front of the Orici's headquarters.

Even Teal’c was surprised when they turned a corner and ran straight into a group of armed guards that were supposed to be another two turns away.

Teal’c had been striding purposefully toward their goal and stopped immediately upon seeing their foes. Vala and Hanis, both of whom had to half-jog to keep up with Teal’c, rounded the corner and took a couple of steps toward the eight men that waited before skidding to a halt.

Vala, of course, recovered first. She put on a bright smile and took yet another step forward. Teal’c allowed himself a slight frown; Vala was now inside the reach of the first guard. It was not a good tactical position.

“Oh, praise the Ori,” she said. “I thought we’d never find anybody else.”

The first man narrowed his eyes, but looked a bit off balance. Vala didn’t wait for him to ask for an explanation.

“You see,” she said, “I had been sent on a very special errand by the Orici just before life support went down, and I know that I’m supposed to get out of the way, but the Orici said it was important. These gentlemen,” she indicated Teal’c and Hanis with a wave of her hand, “offered to accompany me. This ship is so spooky when empty, don’t you think?”

The man hesitated in confusion. One of the other men behind him shifted and asked, “Aren’t you the Orici’s mother?”

Vala laughed nervously as the men’s faces began to show recognition.

“Oh, it’s funny you say that—I get that all the time.” The lead man shifted his grip on his staff weapon as Vala continued, now backing away. “Adria herself sometimes remarks that I—“ The man lunged as Vala ducked to the side and away from his grasp. Teal’c, who had worked his own stolen weapon free surreptitiously during the exchange, shot him quickly, and took cover behind a nearby door frame. Hanis followed suit, and together they managed to take down everyone, Vala assisting by hitting one particularly burly man over the head. It only stunned him, but Teal’c was able to take him down without any problem.

They stood in the middle of the unconscious guards and Vala and Teal'c exchanged a satisfied look.

The three of them tied up the guards and kept moving. They met no more resistance, and reached the Orici's quarters without incident. Teal'c opened the door cautiously, weapon at the ready.

There was no one inside. When Vala stepped over the threshold, a hologram flickered to life, emanating from a stone on the table. Adria's grave face looked out at them.

“This moment was foreseen, Mother. Do not think that this paltry victory means anything. The Ori are the true masters, here, and Their will will prevail.”

Vala rolled her eyes. “Just wait until I get my hands on you, young lady.”

*_*_*_*_*_*

The bridge of the Carter-O’Neill was completely silent.

“You started a _mutiny_ on an _Ori ship_?” Cameron asked.

“And you won?” Daniel added.

Vala scowled.

Teal’c raised an eyebrow. “Indeed.”

Cameron looked impressed. Daniel looked like he was ready to keel over. Thor regarded them both with a serene expression, having heard most of the story before contacting Cameron and Daniel to meet them on the bridge.

“It really wasn’t that _hard_ , Daniel. Don’t look so surprised.” Vala chided.

“Vala proved herself to be a most effective leader, Daniel Jackson.”

Daniel almost laughed, but it was slightly choked.

Teal’c continued, unperturbed. “I believe we may have overestimated the fervor of the followers of the Ori. It would appear that there are many more who doubt than we previously thought.”

Vala nodded enthusiastically. “I think I’m getting good at this rebel-with-a-cause thing. I’ve been thinking about taking my new ship and seeing if I can’t rally the troops to our cause.”

She looked back and forth between the others.

Finally, Daniel cleared his throat. “New…ship?”

Vala’s eyes widened. “Oh, silly me,” she said, exchanging a look with Teal’c. “I forgot to mention the fact that Hanis and the rest of his men have graciously loaned us the use of their ship.”

“An…Ori ship…” Daniel said weakly.

Vala beamed. “Yes. We’re calling her the _Black Heart II_ , seeing as the first _Black Heart_ met an untimely end.”

Teal’c looked smug.


End file.
